My inspiration for these posts was hearing other women's stories. Sadly some believe the lies and lose their money along with their self esteem. Ladies, don't get sucked in.
A couple of years ago there was a guy that started writing. Once again, great profile. The introductory email was funny and engaging. He was a bit older than me, widowed with children and lived in Montreal. He was an engineer (surprise, surprise!). Given he lived in Montreal, I wasn't interested in a long distance relationship and made that clear. We emailed on POF for a couple of weeks. He said he was originally from the UK. His wife had passed away and his daughter had left to attend university in Italy. His son was killed in a car accident when he was 5 years old. His family was all overseas, so he had no issues commuting or relocating. I gave him the benefit of the doubt, but took what he said with a grain of salt. With no other prospects on the horizon, I could kill some time and who knows. We have to try to remain hopeful and positive with an open mind.
We moved to texting then spoke on the phone. Suddenly he announced he wouldn't be able to meet for a while because he was currently working on a project in the UK. Ok, first red flag now I was on alert. He was building a seniors residence outside of London. The project was due to be completed before Christmas. Then he sent pictures of himself in a convertible that conveniently showed his Rolex watch. At this point, he lost me. All the signs of a player were there. He sent endless emails which were all copy paste from sites for men trying to take advantage of women. I was shocked when these sites came up. Amazing what you can find on the internet! He insisted he had composed them himself. Yeah sure.
Of course he professed his undying love and devotion. During periods of time when he didn't call or email, he claimed his daughter was visiting from Italy and he was busy showing her around. So much for working 20 hour days because the project was behind schedule and then a storm damaged the building. Not to mention school was not on break in Italy so highly unlikely his daughter was in the UK. Handy to have family and friends around the world that you can contact to confirm details. This guy was totally married. He seemed to keep losing his cell phone, changed the number 4 times in less than 2 months!
Then the kicker, he wrote to say that because the final payment for his contract exceeded $300K, the bank in London had frozen his accounts pending him providing his business registration and work visa documents. He'd have to come home to Montreal to get them and with all of his accounts frozen, he needed money. Funny because he had previously mentioned he had an open ticket to come home as soon as the project was done. It pays to keep track of details and write them down!
My response? "Given your profession and the fact that you have a company, I highly doubt you would only have one bank account and no credit cards. How would a bank in the UK freeze all of your Canadian accounts? Not possible. Even if your business account is frozen, you would have access to funds elsewhere and your personal accounts. You mentioned your brother lives in the US, why wouldn't you contact him for assistance? Oh and you have an open ticket so no issue getting home. You can figure out your banking stuff when you get back to Montreal."
He was not happy and claimed I didn't understand how international contracts worked. I told him I had a law degree and did some research. Out of curiosity, I had logged into POF and found his profile. He had told me he had deleted it after he started communicating with me. Sure, what a liar. Now the profile stated he lived in British Columbia and he had added more pictures. When I confronted him, he got angry.
Him: "How dare you go into POF to look for other men. We're a couple. How am I supposed to trust you? I don't have time for this bullshit."
Me: "How dare you lie and copy paste emails from online sites. Trust me? You mean I can't trust you. Now you live in Vancouver? What happened to Montreal?"
Him: "Not that it's any of your business nor do I have to explain myself to you, but I lent my POF profile to a friend."
Me: "Are you kidding me? Is that the best story you can come up with? Lent your profile? Funny, so your friend looks identical to you, is widowed, has kids and is also an engineer? What a coincidence? You're a horrible liar and I don't need this shit. It takes all of 5 minutes to create a profile and your friend had to borrow yours? Oh, so I guess you let him know every time there's a new email since the email address linked to the account would be yours? Which means you log in there regularly and you're pissed at me and accuse me of not being trust worthy? Go look in the mirror, the person looking back at you is the lying cheat. Best of luck with your search!"
Unreal! Women, please I beg you to be cautious. Don't fall for these predators. Write things down, keep track, do some research, ask questions and request proof. If you can't verify and confirm what he's telling you, chances are it's all lies. Meet him in person first!!!
Sadly the friend of a friend met a guy online, again he was an engineer working on a project in Malaysia. They fell in love and would move in together when he got back home. Yeah sure. Everyone warned her to be careful, not to be so trusting of someone she hadn't met in person. Don't rush, wait until he gets back before you get too invested. The project kept getting extended. Several weeks into the conversation, he had lost his wallet and passport. Begged her for help to buy a new airline ticket, he'd pay her back as soon as he got home. She fell for it and sent him $5,000.00. Surprise, surprise, she never heard from him again. All the phone numbers and email accounts were deleted and he disappeared. She was devastated.
Be careful and don't believe anything a stranger tells you.
Dateless in Ottawa
No comments:
Post a Comment