Hello,
I've been toying with the idea of possibly going back to online dating at some point, but still not 100% ready or convinced it's for me. Just the thought actually causes me a bit of anxiety. Friends and family have been suggesting sites so I figured I'd do some research to see what's out there. Even if it's not for me, it makes me feel good to help others.
If you have any suggestions on site or other methods, I'm game. As I check out the various sites I'll post some information along with my thoughts and opinions. Feel free to share your comments, experiences and feelings on some of the sites you might have tried. What worked? What didn't work? Which ones would you recommend? What have your friends, family or co-workers tried?
Let's all go do some research and check back. Like I keep telling my single friends, one should never give up hope. The right person will come along eventually. If only I could take my own advice!
Oh well, good luck and I'll post some details soon!
Dateless in Ottawa
Wednesday 13 September 2017
Sunday 10 September 2017
Going to Weddings when you're Single
As ok as I am with being single, going to a wedding is a whole different ball game. This was the first wedding I attended since my husband's death. These were close friends and I was honoured to help out with some of the planning and last minute tasks. Weddings are fabulous celebrations with great food, company and special moments, but this one affected me emotionally. As in many cases, the majority of the guests were couples. I wasn't alone as my children were with me, however it's not the same as being with a date or significant other. Watching couples interact makes me long for the same thing. It took me back to my wedding day and how much fun we had.
Seeing a gentleman pull out the chair for his significant other, hold her purse, go to the bar to get her favourite drink, share a private toast, place his suit jacket over her shoulders at the first sign of a chill, lead her to the dance floor...all lovely romantic gestures. I'll forever be a sucker for chivalry and this is what I miss most.
When the music started, that's when it hit me like a freight train. The Latin blood in me starts to dance the minute the first note plays. All this long before my brain clues in to the fact that music is playing. It's like my body has a mind of its own. My feet start to tap to the rhythm of the music and soon my entire body is aching to move and deeply affected by the music. Luckily my youngest loves to dance so she kept me company on the dance floor and had all the guests thoroughly entertained. The bride's son was also an amazing dancer. My oldest kids were like, "No way, what do you mean? I am not dancing Mom." Quite surprising given that all of my girls take dance classes and compete, they should be naturals! All of a sudden they seemed awkward and unable to dance. So much for moving to the rhythm of the music. Ok so some of the songs were a bit older, but come on the 90's and early 2000's had awesome dance music! Then there's the Latin tunes, how can anyone not get up and dance? The teenage years have made my kids unsocial and way too self conscious.
I love watching couples dance. Many at this wedding obviously take dance lessons. It's so beautiful to watch them glide around the dance floor in sync and perfectly coordinated. Reminds me of the movies with Fred Astaire and Ginger Rogers, not to mention my parents who were also amazing dancers. As a child I think I spent way too much time watching, should've taken more lessons!
Sadly when the slow songs start, you find yourself sitting alone at the table. Even my kids took off. The photo booth was far more interesting than watching the dance floor. It also happens when I go out with my friends, I'm the fifth wheel. This is what I find difficult. You can only go the bathroom so many times. Have you ever noticed that DJ's have a habit of playing 2-3 slow songs in a row? Well this guy seemed to have all the extended versions to boot! Thank you very much, maybe I should go for a long walk, read a book...can we please go back to the Latin tunes???
Coincidentally, just before going to the wedding I was talking to a close friend who'd gone to a wedding the week before. He too was feeling a bit down and lonely. It makes you question where you are in life, where you'd like to be and where others think you should be. At times you wonder whether there's something wrong with you. Everyone else seems to be happy and with someone, how come not me? Where are we supposed to look? Are you doing things right? What would make you happy? Are our expectations unreasonable? So many questions. Given his experiences he's not sure he's ready to go back to online dating which is apparently the best and/or only option for finding "the one." I'm in the same boat, maybe eventually.
Oh well, perhaps one day we'll look back and laugh at our current sorrows. The key is to trust that we're exactly where we are supposed to be, while never giving up hope. Good luck!
Dateless in Ottawa
Seeing a gentleman pull out the chair for his significant other, hold her purse, go to the bar to get her favourite drink, share a private toast, place his suit jacket over her shoulders at the first sign of a chill, lead her to the dance floor...all lovely romantic gestures. I'll forever be a sucker for chivalry and this is what I miss most.
When the music started, that's when it hit me like a freight train. The Latin blood in me starts to dance the minute the first note plays. All this long before my brain clues in to the fact that music is playing. It's like my body has a mind of its own. My feet start to tap to the rhythm of the music and soon my entire body is aching to move and deeply affected by the music. Luckily my youngest loves to dance so she kept me company on the dance floor and had all the guests thoroughly entertained. The bride's son was also an amazing dancer. My oldest kids were like, "No way, what do you mean? I am not dancing Mom." Quite surprising given that all of my girls take dance classes and compete, they should be naturals! All of a sudden they seemed awkward and unable to dance. So much for moving to the rhythm of the music. Ok so some of the songs were a bit older, but come on the 90's and early 2000's had awesome dance music! Then there's the Latin tunes, how can anyone not get up and dance? The teenage years have made my kids unsocial and way too self conscious.
I love watching couples dance. Many at this wedding obviously take dance lessons. It's so beautiful to watch them glide around the dance floor in sync and perfectly coordinated. Reminds me of the movies with Fred Astaire and Ginger Rogers, not to mention my parents who were also amazing dancers. As a child I think I spent way too much time watching, should've taken more lessons!
Sadly when the slow songs start, you find yourself sitting alone at the table. Even my kids took off. The photo booth was far more interesting than watching the dance floor. It also happens when I go out with my friends, I'm the fifth wheel. This is what I find difficult. You can only go the bathroom so many times. Have you ever noticed that DJ's have a habit of playing 2-3 slow songs in a row? Well this guy seemed to have all the extended versions to boot! Thank you very much, maybe I should go for a long walk, read a book...can we please go back to the Latin tunes???
Coincidentally, just before going to the wedding I was talking to a close friend who'd gone to a wedding the week before. He too was feeling a bit down and lonely. It makes you question where you are in life, where you'd like to be and where others think you should be. At times you wonder whether there's something wrong with you. Everyone else seems to be happy and with someone, how come not me? Where are we supposed to look? Are you doing things right? What would make you happy? Are our expectations unreasonable? So many questions. Given his experiences he's not sure he's ready to go back to online dating which is apparently the best and/or only option for finding "the one." I'm in the same boat, maybe eventually.
Oh well, perhaps one day we'll look back and laugh at our current sorrows. The key is to trust that we're exactly where we are supposed to be, while never giving up hope. Good luck!
Dateless in Ottawa
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