Hands are one of the first things I notice when I meet someone. They come in all shapes, sizes and colours. Long fingers, short fingers, very warm and strong, cold, gentle and soft. Some have jewellery, or tattoos, perhaps a watch there are countless variations. Feet are usually more hidden, but sooner or later they make an appearance. One thing I'd like to point out, you don't wear socks with sandals or nylons with open toed shoes. Major fashion faux pas. Sorry, had to get that off my chest! Lol
Hands can tell you a bit about a person. Their appearance and how they feel can give you an idea or hint about the kind of work they do for a living.
1. If they are blackened and greasy looking, perhaps they're a mechanic?
2. If they feel rough and there's dirt under the nails you know they definitely work with their hands. Maybe construction or a trade.
3. If they are smooth and clean, they probably have a white collar job and work in an office or they might be a bit metrosexual and go out of their way to make sure they look good! Lol
The appearance of a person's hands can also reflect on the person's level of hygiene. Dirty and unkept looking hands are not very appealing. The first thought that comes to my mind is, "He ain't touching me with those hands."
When a guy works in a trade or as a mechanic, I get it your hands get dirty, but there are products out there to clean them. Even something as simple as keeping your nails trimmed makes a huge difference. When nails are too long, dirt accumulates underneath them and all you see is a thick black line. Long and jagged nails don't look good either and can do a lot of damage, if you know what I mean. Feel free to ask for clarification, although it should be very obvious.
Keep in mind that your butt is cleaner than your hands to begin with. Hands touch all kinds of things on a regular basis putting them in contact with a multitude of germs and bacteria. When you don't wash them or remove the dirt from underneath your finger nails, you make it far worse and encourage bacteria to thrive.
I know I'm super anal and wash my hands any chance I get. All my friends laugh at me because I have wipes in my purse at all times. This dates back to when I started babysitting my best friend's baby. When I had my children, I always insisted people wash their hands before touching them. I can't stand it when my hands are dirty. Being an esthetician, I think back to my courses. The importance of nail hygiene to prevent fungal infections was hammered into us by our teacher. It's incredible how dirty our hands are. People think using hand sanitizer is the solution, but unless it has a minimum alcohol content of 70%, there's no point. Better than nothing I suppose, but good old fashioned soap and water is the best thing to use.
It really irks me when a guy touches my face after he's just finished eating with his hands or he was handling his car keys or money. My skin crawls. By the way, if you just finished a cigar, please go wash your hands although that smell lingers for days. Having sensitive skin, it doesn't take much to cause a breakout or rash. Please wash your hands before you touch me! It's amazing how many people don't realize or think. Common sense goes a long way.
Nail biters are annoying too, but I have to keep in mind that I used to bite my nails so badly they'd bleed. Nothing worse than trying to have a conversation with someone that constantly has their fingers in their mouth! Not to mention how ugly their nails and hands look. Thankfully I managed to stop that terrible habit and then went on to become a hand model of all things! Best paying job I've ever had. I have what the modelling industry considers perfect hands.
Ladies, if you're going to go to the trouble of painting your nails, keep them looking good. Chipped or worn off polish looks terrible. If you're a nail biter, don't bother with polish. Last thing you need to do is ingest formaldehyde and other chemicals I can't spell or pronounce which are found in most nail polishes.
At the end of the day, take pride in your overall appearance. Don't you want the person you're with to be able to touch you and have it feel good? This applies to men and women. There's no excuse. Don't get me wrong, there are times when dirty can be lots of fun...perhaps playing with food, glow in the dark body paint, chocolate, whatever your flavour. You make do with what you have and let the creative juices flow.
Just like cold hand or feet, nothing worse than hands or feet that feel like sandpaper against your skin or nails cutting you. That happened to me once. We were in bed and his toe nails were really long. While play fighting one of the nails cut the side of my foot open. It totally spoiled the mood and made a mess. Unbelievable how much a cut on your foot can bleed! There's all kinds of products and creams to help with dry skin. Yes, this also applies to your feet and toe nails. Bacteria creates odours so keep them clean and well trimmed too! Once in a while the rough and unkept look can be sexy, but there's a limit. If you can't be bothered to do it yourself, treat yourself to a manicure and a pedicure. You'll love it. Ladies like I've said before, if you can find a guy that enjoys manicure/pedicure dates with you, he's a keeper!
Go wash your hands!
Dateless in Ottawa
Wednesday 17 May 2017
Sunday 14 May 2017
Strange Interactions - Updated
For those of you have used or are using online dating, you encounter all kinds of individuals. We get our share of strange emails and interactions. Remaining friends is a great option when I meet a guy who is nice, but we just don't have the chemistry to build a relationship. Online dating can result in a number of different types of relationships, friendship being one of them. It could be because we have a hobby or interest in common. Career wise networking is important and different people can have skills that can add to our lives or help with advancement. Alternatively if I can help someone, it makes me feel good.
Over the years I've stayed friends with some of the guys I've met. Having someone you can call when a question comes up in an area of their expertise is awesome. Car repairs is a perfect example! Construction, taxes and computers are others. Nice to have people around whose company you enjoy. Why eat alone or spend a weekend at home bored?
Let's back track to bachelor #40 - Mr. Navy. Due to his indecisiveness (amoung other things), he was definitely not for me, but I enjoyed our conversations and later on my son was able to shadow him at work for a school project. Not long after I ended things, he met someone else. They're still together. We stay in touch casually on Facebook and went to a movie before he met his new girlfriend. The odd time we'll run into each other through work. Last time he was with a client and he went on and on about how great I was. The poor client was trying to talk business and at a loss for words. I finally excused myself, but he made it a point to come and find me before he left.
One day out of the blue he texted. We chatted for a bit. He caught me off guard because it was 1:00 am and he's not a night owl. He started sending me the lyrics of his favourite Spanish song. It sounded like he was melancholy and lonely, might have even been drinking because he wasn't making any sense. All of a sudden in mid conversation he says, "Exactly one year ago today we were tanning in my backyard." I didn't know what to say. When you're in a relationship with someone else, why contact someone you dated previously to mention that? Nice thing to remember on your anniversary when you're with the same person, but it seemed out of place especially since we only dated for a couple of weeks.
He sent a message for my birthday. A while later when planning a group trip to Cuba, he emailed to ask if I was interested in joining. I couldn't go at that time, but thanked him for thinking of me. Then he said we should meet for drinks so he could brush up on his Spanish. I found it odd and decided to call it a night. He had a bad track record for making plans, so if he wanted to meet for drinks he could make the plans. He made it a point to remind me that he was still going out with the same person. I told him I was seeing someone too. I didn't hear from him again for a long while.
Just recently he started texting again late one night. He mentioned he was going to Cuba with his girlfriend in a few weeks. I wished him a good trip then he asked me if I'd like to go with them. This seemed really odd. A vacation would be awesome, but I don't think that would be a good idea. I appreciated the offer, but turned him down. Then he says, "This weather has been so unpredictable. Two years ago today you and I were taking in the sun in my backyard." Ok, so now he's been with this chick for close to 2 years and apparently it's serious. Why contact me to reminisce about a date that happened 2 years ago and ask me to join them on their trip? Sure, I'll be the third wheel....NOT! Very weird if you ask me. How would he introduce me? This is ------, we dated for a couple of weeks and tanned in my backyard 2 years ago. Not too awkward, I'm sure his girlfriend would be thrilled to have me along.
I guess I should be grateful, interactions like these make life more interesting. Maybe next time I'll say yes to joining them on a trip. Wouldn't that be interesting. If it ever happens, I'll write a post on my blog and fill you all in! Lol
P.S. Had to add more to this post. So, there's a work event coming up in a few weeks and Mr. Navy wrote to ask me if I'd be there cause he can't wait to see me. For the life of me, I'll never understand men.
P.P.S. He found me at the work event. It was busy and he tried to carry on a conversation in Spanish. I had to get back to work. We hadn't seen each other in about a year. As we age we change, some for the better others....I'll leave it at that.
Have fun and feel free to share some of your unusual stories.
Dateless in Ottawa
Over the years I've stayed friends with some of the guys I've met. Having someone you can call when a question comes up in an area of their expertise is awesome. Car repairs is a perfect example! Construction, taxes and computers are others. Nice to have people around whose company you enjoy. Why eat alone or spend a weekend at home bored?
Let's back track to bachelor #40 - Mr. Navy. Due to his indecisiveness (amoung other things), he was definitely not for me, but I enjoyed our conversations and later on my son was able to shadow him at work for a school project. Not long after I ended things, he met someone else. They're still together. We stay in touch casually on Facebook and went to a movie before he met his new girlfriend. The odd time we'll run into each other through work. Last time he was with a client and he went on and on about how great I was. The poor client was trying to talk business and at a loss for words. I finally excused myself, but he made it a point to come and find me before he left.
One day out of the blue he texted. We chatted for a bit. He caught me off guard because it was 1:00 am and he's not a night owl. He started sending me the lyrics of his favourite Spanish song. It sounded like he was melancholy and lonely, might have even been drinking because he wasn't making any sense. All of a sudden in mid conversation he says, "Exactly one year ago today we were tanning in my backyard." I didn't know what to say. When you're in a relationship with someone else, why contact someone you dated previously to mention that? Nice thing to remember on your anniversary when you're with the same person, but it seemed out of place especially since we only dated for a couple of weeks.
He sent a message for my birthday. A while later when planning a group trip to Cuba, he emailed to ask if I was interested in joining. I couldn't go at that time, but thanked him for thinking of me. Then he said we should meet for drinks so he could brush up on his Spanish. I found it odd and decided to call it a night. He had a bad track record for making plans, so if he wanted to meet for drinks he could make the plans. He made it a point to remind me that he was still going out with the same person. I told him I was seeing someone too. I didn't hear from him again for a long while.
Just recently he started texting again late one night. He mentioned he was going to Cuba with his girlfriend in a few weeks. I wished him a good trip then he asked me if I'd like to go with them. This seemed really odd. A vacation would be awesome, but I don't think that would be a good idea. I appreciated the offer, but turned him down. Then he says, "This weather has been so unpredictable. Two years ago today you and I were taking in the sun in my backyard." Ok, so now he's been with this chick for close to 2 years and apparently it's serious. Why contact me to reminisce about a date that happened 2 years ago and ask me to join them on their trip? Sure, I'll be the third wheel....NOT! Very weird if you ask me. How would he introduce me? This is ------, we dated for a couple of weeks and tanned in my backyard 2 years ago. Not too awkward, I'm sure his girlfriend would be thrilled to have me along.
I guess I should be grateful, interactions like these make life more interesting. Maybe next time I'll say yes to joining them on a trip. Wouldn't that be interesting. If it ever happens, I'll write a post on my blog and fill you all in! Lol
P.S. Had to add more to this post. So, there's a work event coming up in a few weeks and Mr. Navy wrote to ask me if I'd be there cause he can't wait to see me. For the life of me, I'll never understand men.
P.P.S. He found me at the work event. It was busy and he tried to carry on a conversation in Spanish. I had to get back to work. We hadn't seen each other in about a year. As we age we change, some for the better others....I'll leave it at that.
Have fun and feel free to share some of your unusual stories.
Dateless in Ottawa
Thursday 4 May 2017
Men, Vehicles and Dating
When it comes to cars, men are usually more knowledgeable than women. My husband was an exception. He didn't even know what a tune up was, I was floored! The year I turned 21 I bought my first car. It was a bright yellow, standard transmission Hyundai Scoupe with a cool black graphics package. I had to have a stick shift, it was so much fun. When I brought it home my Dad said I had to learn how to change a tire. Well, I spent the entire day taking them off and putting them back on. When I was done changing them about 4 times, Dad came over and said, "There, now you know how to take the jack out and change a tire. If ever you're out and get a flat tire don't call me, do it yourself." Soon after I learned how to pump my own gas, check the oil, verify the tire pressure and the basics under the hood. The dealership still managed to rip me off on numerous occasions, but I slowly learned all the terminology they use to trick women into unnecessary repairs.
Fast forward to men and dating. It's amazing the impact a vehicle can have on the way a woman is perceived. My Scoupe was a cute little sports car, exactly what many would figure was perfect for a girly girl. I will admit most guys weren't crazy about being seen in it. Then I got a Jeep TJ and all the guys wanted a ride in it, especially in the Summer with the top off! Funny cause they'd all say that was a guy vehicle. Boy do I still miss my Jeep, but after becoming a Mom everyone said I needed a safer vehicle because it was a soft top. I shouldn't have listened to them, mind you after baby #3 arrived I would've had no choice as you can't put a baby seat in the front passenger seat. Oh well, I will get another one eventually.
After the kids arrived, a mini-van was the most convenient and cost effective mode of transportation. Definitely not a sexy vehicle by any stretch of the imagination, but it was practical with lots of room for baby gear and extra friends too! It still works well for growing teenagers, sports and a dance Mom. Can't beat it when it comes to comfort, especially on long road trips. Show up for a date in the mini-van and you have Mom written all over your face!
Personally I've always loved larger vehicles. Most of it probably stems from the fact that my parents only bought full-sized station wagons. The best part was the flip up third row seat that faced the back. Growing up we fought over the back row, but as we got older we didn't want to get caught dead driving them. Mind you, when you were going out with a bunch of friends there was tons of room. Heck you could have a party in those suckers! For me it's the safety factor. I feel way safer in a big vehicle plus with our winters, they are far better on the road. My Scoupe was so light it was all over the place in the winter. I'd have to load the back trunk with salt or sand bags to weight it down. After that I swore I'd never buy another small car.
The Tahoe and the Yukon XL are my favourites. I'd also take a Suburban, but the older styles. The newer ones are way smaller and too sleek looking. With a large family, size matters!
Enter dating:
I love men's reactions when I arrive for a first date in my truck. A Chevy Silverado is not what a guy expects a women to show up in. Kind of gives me a rugged kind of tough look, but there I am in a dress and heels! Reactions vary, some good, others not so much. After a while I used these reactions to gauge whether or not there was going to be a second date. I think the bad ones were based more on vehicle envy and for me that was a major turn off. I won't tell you what to drive, so extend me the same courtesy. On the other hand, if I show up in the mini-van, I can't escape the Mom stereotype!
After one first date I remember going out to the parking lot and the gentleman saying, "Wait, don't tell me which car is yours. Let me guess." I knew he'd never think to pick the truck, but decided to play along for fun. The parking lot was full and sure enough, he started with all the small cars. Eventually there was only my truck left. He turned to me with a look of complete and utter disgust, "Please tell me that truck isn't yours." OMG, was he kidding me? He went on to lecture me about how he doesn't waste money on big cars, he just buys old second hand vehicles and drives them until they die. Funny, he drove an old Cavalier which looked like a Hotwheels car next to my truck. He had the nerve to say the truck had to go. Really, or else what? I think not, I told him the truck was staying and he was gone.
Another guy had an issue with the fact that the truck had belonged to my late husband. He insisted I had to sell it as I didn't need to have 2 vehicles. I love it when others decide what I should or shouldn't have. In this case I think vehicle envy played a huge roll given that my truck was a 4x4 and had a lot more features than his. He also said he'd never drive a truck that belonged to another man. Who asked him to drive my truck??? This coming from a guy who often bought second hand cars. So did he only buy them from women??? Hello, are we in kindergarten? Once again, nope I ain't selling it.
One time I arrived early and waited in the parking lot for my date. Not long afterwards, another truck pulled in and parked next to me. It was identical to mine, only red. Hey it was my date! He was shocked that I drove a truck, but thoroughly impressed. I thought it was so cool that we had matching trucks, sadly the relationship didn't go anywhere. He disappeared after a few weeks.
The best reaction I had was a guy freaking out over the truck. We spent forever in the parking lot looking under the hood and checking out all the features. He even asked if he could take it for a spin so we went for a drive. I let him drive. It was like watching a kid in a candy store. He thought it was awesome that I had a truck. Yes, he got a second date! Lol
Apart from the comments above, here's a few more:
1. I'm going to trade your truck in for a boat or a down payment on a cottage.
- Really? I don't remember agreeing to that, especially after only one date! Not too presumptuous.
2. You're not being environmentally friendly owing 2 large vehicles.
- Interestingly enough he also had 2 vehicles one of which was a much older model mini-van which would have been far less environmentally friendly than mine. Let's also keep in mind that I have 4 kids so I kind of need more room than most.
3. It's way too big, a beautiful lady like you shouldn't be driving this.
- Says who? Since when do looks determine what kind of vehicle you should drive?
4. That's a man's vehicle, we could just trade and you can drive my car.
- Yeah right, I don't think so. Not to mention his little compact car was worth far less than my truck.
5. What a waste of money, you must pay a fortune for insurance.
- They almost faint when they discover insurance for both of my vehicles is far less than what they pay for one.
Funny when guys are anal about their vehicle. In some cases it's like you to have to put plastic on the seats and remove your shoes before you get in. Can you make a person feel any more unwelcomed or uncomfortable? Never mind, I'll just follow you in my car. Then the opposite extreme where there's garbage everywhere and it wreaks like an ashtray or a garbage dumpster. You couldn't pay me to get in! Even more amusing when they go on and on about all the luxury cars they have and show up in an old rusted out jolopy. Of course the good car is in for servicing or storage - in the middle of Summer? Sure! Wait a minute, didn't you say you have 3 luxury vehicles? What's wrong with the other 2? Oh yeah, those are the imaginary ones. I'm not 18, so a BMW or a Porsche won't impress me, In all honesty, they never did. Show up in a Yukon XL or a Suburban and you'll have my complete and undivided attention! Lol
As I've said before, no point in lying because eventually the truth will come out. I could care less what a guy drives, just make sure you keep it somewhat clean if you expect me to get into it. Live and let live. We all have our preferences and financial limits. In my case I have 4 kids and it's not uncommon for me to have a couple of their friends or my nephews tag along so I need a larger vehicle. I'm paying for it so no one should be dictating to me what I should or shouldn't drive.
Things to keep in mind.
Dateless in Ottawa
Fast forward to men and dating. It's amazing the impact a vehicle can have on the way a woman is perceived. My Scoupe was a cute little sports car, exactly what many would figure was perfect for a girly girl. I will admit most guys weren't crazy about being seen in it. Then I got a Jeep TJ and all the guys wanted a ride in it, especially in the Summer with the top off! Funny cause they'd all say that was a guy vehicle. Boy do I still miss my Jeep, but after becoming a Mom everyone said I needed a safer vehicle because it was a soft top. I shouldn't have listened to them, mind you after baby #3 arrived I would've had no choice as you can't put a baby seat in the front passenger seat. Oh well, I will get another one eventually.
After the kids arrived, a mini-van was the most convenient and cost effective mode of transportation. Definitely not a sexy vehicle by any stretch of the imagination, but it was practical with lots of room for baby gear and extra friends too! It still works well for growing teenagers, sports and a dance Mom. Can't beat it when it comes to comfort, especially on long road trips. Show up for a date in the mini-van and you have Mom written all over your face!
Personally I've always loved larger vehicles. Most of it probably stems from the fact that my parents only bought full-sized station wagons. The best part was the flip up third row seat that faced the back. Growing up we fought over the back row, but as we got older we didn't want to get caught dead driving them. Mind you, when you were going out with a bunch of friends there was tons of room. Heck you could have a party in those suckers! For me it's the safety factor. I feel way safer in a big vehicle plus with our winters, they are far better on the road. My Scoupe was so light it was all over the place in the winter. I'd have to load the back trunk with salt or sand bags to weight it down. After that I swore I'd never buy another small car.
The Tahoe and the Yukon XL are my favourites. I'd also take a Suburban, but the older styles. The newer ones are way smaller and too sleek looking. With a large family, size matters!
Enter dating:
I love men's reactions when I arrive for a first date in my truck. A Chevy Silverado is not what a guy expects a women to show up in. Kind of gives me a rugged kind of tough look, but there I am in a dress and heels! Reactions vary, some good, others not so much. After a while I used these reactions to gauge whether or not there was going to be a second date. I think the bad ones were based more on vehicle envy and for me that was a major turn off. I won't tell you what to drive, so extend me the same courtesy. On the other hand, if I show up in the mini-van, I can't escape the Mom stereotype!
After one first date I remember going out to the parking lot and the gentleman saying, "Wait, don't tell me which car is yours. Let me guess." I knew he'd never think to pick the truck, but decided to play along for fun. The parking lot was full and sure enough, he started with all the small cars. Eventually there was only my truck left. He turned to me with a look of complete and utter disgust, "Please tell me that truck isn't yours." OMG, was he kidding me? He went on to lecture me about how he doesn't waste money on big cars, he just buys old second hand vehicles and drives them until they die. Funny, he drove an old Cavalier which looked like a Hotwheels car next to my truck. He had the nerve to say the truck had to go. Really, or else what? I think not, I told him the truck was staying and he was gone.
Another guy had an issue with the fact that the truck had belonged to my late husband. He insisted I had to sell it as I didn't need to have 2 vehicles. I love it when others decide what I should or shouldn't have. In this case I think vehicle envy played a huge roll given that my truck was a 4x4 and had a lot more features than his. He also said he'd never drive a truck that belonged to another man. Who asked him to drive my truck??? This coming from a guy who often bought second hand cars. So did he only buy them from women??? Hello, are we in kindergarten? Once again, nope I ain't selling it.
One time I arrived early and waited in the parking lot for my date. Not long afterwards, another truck pulled in and parked next to me. It was identical to mine, only red. Hey it was my date! He was shocked that I drove a truck, but thoroughly impressed. I thought it was so cool that we had matching trucks, sadly the relationship didn't go anywhere. He disappeared after a few weeks.
The best reaction I had was a guy freaking out over the truck. We spent forever in the parking lot looking under the hood and checking out all the features. He even asked if he could take it for a spin so we went for a drive. I let him drive. It was like watching a kid in a candy store. He thought it was awesome that I had a truck. Yes, he got a second date! Lol
Apart from the comments above, here's a few more:
1. I'm going to trade your truck in for a boat or a down payment on a cottage.
- Really? I don't remember agreeing to that, especially after only one date! Not too presumptuous.
2. You're not being environmentally friendly owing 2 large vehicles.
- Interestingly enough he also had 2 vehicles one of which was a much older model mini-van which would have been far less environmentally friendly than mine. Let's also keep in mind that I have 4 kids so I kind of need more room than most.
3. It's way too big, a beautiful lady like you shouldn't be driving this.
- Says who? Since when do looks determine what kind of vehicle you should drive?
4. That's a man's vehicle, we could just trade and you can drive my car.
- Yeah right, I don't think so. Not to mention his little compact car was worth far less than my truck.
5. What a waste of money, you must pay a fortune for insurance.
- They almost faint when they discover insurance for both of my vehicles is far less than what they pay for one.
Funny when guys are anal about their vehicle. In some cases it's like you to have to put plastic on the seats and remove your shoes before you get in. Can you make a person feel any more unwelcomed or uncomfortable? Never mind, I'll just follow you in my car. Then the opposite extreme where there's garbage everywhere and it wreaks like an ashtray or a garbage dumpster. You couldn't pay me to get in! Even more amusing when they go on and on about all the luxury cars they have and show up in an old rusted out jolopy. Of course the good car is in for servicing or storage - in the middle of Summer? Sure! Wait a minute, didn't you say you have 3 luxury vehicles? What's wrong with the other 2? Oh yeah, those are the imaginary ones. I'm not 18, so a BMW or a Porsche won't impress me, In all honesty, they never did. Show up in a Yukon XL or a Suburban and you'll have my complete and undivided attention! Lol
As I've said before, no point in lying because eventually the truth will come out. I could care less what a guy drives, just make sure you keep it somewhat clean if you expect me to get into it. Live and let live. We all have our preferences and financial limits. In my case I have 4 kids and it's not uncommon for me to have a couple of their friends or my nephews tag along so I need a larger vehicle. I'm paying for it so no one should be dictating to me what I should or shouldn't drive.
Things to keep in mind.
Dateless in Ottawa
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)