A mere seconds after activating my profile, the emails started pouring in. I guess I was the fresh bait and the piranhas started circling! Lol
My goodness, nothing could have prepared me for the endless barrage of emails. I've used online dating many times over the years, but I've never gotten this many emails in such a short period of time. It was insane. Any time I was logged into the site, it was worse probably because they could see I was online and more likely that I would show up in searches within my city and under new users. Now I totally understand how Nemo and Dory felt when they were surrounded by seagulls yelling, "Mine!", "Mine!", "Mine!" Talk about feeling like a piece of meat!
Part of me felt excited, but I'm not used to getting so much attention so it felt weird. At the same time I felt overwhelmed and scared. Was I really ready to date? The key was to remain hopeful and go with the flow. I told myself to have fun and enjoy the attention!
At times having a profile on a dating site makes me feel like I'm a mail order bride or a product in a Sears catalogue. You have a picture(s), list of interests (equivalent to features I suppose!), likes, dislikes, some personal info about you...a bit of everything. No matter how well written your profile is, at the end of the day your picture(s) are what get the most attention. If the men like what they see, there's a higher likelihood they will email you.
Funny that no matter how specific you make your criteria when setting up your preferences and what you write in your profile in an effort to weed out the creeps, some how they still manage to get through and email you.
Popular work arounds:
1. Age
This is the easiest category to play with because when you create your profile, you can put whatever date of birth you want. Pick an age, any age! You want a summer birthday instead of a winter one, you can have that too! The only catch is that you only have 48 hours to make corrections, otherwise you're stuck with that age. If only I could permanently shed 20 years off my age!
Many guys will tell you in their profile that they lied about their age. Kudos for being honest, but if I say I'm looking for a man aged 45-55 don't expect me to give you the time of day. Not to mention you're being dishonest because the search tool works based on the date of birth appearing in your profile. I'm not here to waste anyone's time, so please don't waste mine. Yes there's the age old saying, "Age doesn't define you", but I know what I want and I'm not budging on this one.
Flattering when guys in their 20's and 30's write, "I'm really 27, but I prefer older more experienced women so I lied about my age so I could write to you." Thanks for the compliment, I think? But I don't recall writing that I offer Chivalry, Diaper Changing and Sex 101 classes in my profile.
Then there's the older guys, I love how they try to justify lying about their age. "I may be 65, but everyone tells me I look like I'm 40." Yeah dude, just saw your profile pictures. So you looked 40, back when you were 40??? Unbelievable!
2. Body Type
This one is very subjective. Hard not to laugh when you see some of the profile pictures then read what the user chose for their body type. Athletic is probably the most frequently used, perhaps too much so! If they only have head shots posted, chances are their body type would fall into the average or a few extra pounds category. Others go with "prefer not to say", but it's kind of obvious when you see the pictures. Not sure a beer belly or being very overweight classify you as being athletic. I'm all for confidence, it's very sexy, but be realistic. Lying on the other hand, is a turn off. I always err on the side of caution and list myself as being average or a few extra pounds. Better to undersell and over deliver vs. oversell and under deliver!
3. Relationship Status
This is the category where many lie. Once again you can choose whatever you want, kind of like the age. You might be married, but decide you're going to say single or divorced. The system has no way of verifying the information you enter. I specifically want someone who's single, divorced or widowed. Sad that they choose to lie. Sooner or later the truth always comes out so what's the point? No doubt there may be women out there that are ok with having a relationship with a married man, I am not.
Stay tuned for stories about my roller coaster ride of Round 34. Have a great week!
Dateless in Ottawa
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